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KIDS SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS

The heading at the top of the page says Ivor Jones and Friends MEMORIES, so I guess it is only right that the memories I share are not only mine but those of my friends.

Following on from my comment in the previous issue of our youngest when playing “I Spy” (saying something beginning with F, which turned out to be Thongs (Fongs), I thought that I would ask some friends about what their kids, grandkids or siblings etc have said which caused merriment, confusion or embarrassment . These were just some of the stories or comments that were told. To avoid embarrassment I have not shown the full names here.

From Fiona “My nan asked some of the grandkids to go find some ‘bark & sticks’ to start the fire with. After some time, one of the boys returned crying that he could find “no barking sticks”.

Another one from Helen – “I used to teach newly-arrived children from many countries so they said some funny things. One boy was telling me about the meat pies (magpies) that were in the park. Another told me he’d been to the fish’ n’ chips (Citizenship) ceremony on Sunday. Kylie yelled out “fire!”- a fly had landed on the table and there were lots more like this. They will all be fluent English -speaking adults now.

Merelyn says “When my daughter was 4 she saw a man with one leg walking his dog who only had 3 legs (this is true). I could see the humour in this but she stated it was not the man and dogs fault if God had run out of legs for them.”

From Doreen comes this little gem “While waiting for a bus my daughter, aged 8, noticed a “No Standing” traffic sign. She wanted to know why a seat wasn’t provided if we weren’t allowed to stand.

Lorraine provided this example “My daughter was 6 years old and playing eye spy her turn came around and said starting with BS after we had exhausted every likely answer she said “bald spot” she was sitting behind her stepdad in the car.”

One from Julie “I heard one about my husband’s cousin in the 60s – he was a young child, kept everyone guessing about something starting with L……turned out to be lectric light”

Pauline of Penrith provided this one. “Our beautiful granddaughter was walking past the TV as they mentioned a story about a serial killer.” Her innocent reply…. “I did not know you could die from eating too much cereal.”

This one was related by Vicki. “My sister saw a road side sign saying ‘Soft Edges’ & she asked Dad why people would be selling soft eggs.”

Here is one from mate, Robert who tells this story. “In the late 90s travelling on the Great Western Highway through the Blue Mountains with my then aged 8 or 9 year old daughter. There was a road side store selling UGG boots and country style articles. She sat bolt upright as we passed the store and yelled out “Cow Jackets!!!!” pointing at the cow hides hanging on the verandah on display”

Lanni from the Hawkesbury provided this one. “We used to play I spy when my youngest was 3 and 4 years old. He couldn’t read. So on his turn he would say “I spy with my little eye something beginning with……H!” We’d list everything we could see beginning with H and nothing matched. Giving up we’d ask him the answer. Sometimes it was chair, sometimes it was light….could be anything because he couldn’t spell”

Now a couple of more from our family. Our eldest who had not long started at preschool was asked “How was school today?” Her response was “I got in trouble because I knocked over the beads” Mum asked “Did you spill them on purpose?” “No” came back the answer “I spilt them on the rug”.

A former son-in-law came in one day, whilst a news story about the visit of President George Bush Snr stopping traffic on the Harbour Bridge. He caught the name “Bush” and said “What Bush?”

Another family member was about to start school, when a neighbour asked “Do you know your tables?” “Yes” was the reply, “we have a coffee table, kitchen table and a dining table”.

My wife’s favourite story is of our grandson Cory. Aged about 3, he was asleep in his car seat when we stopped at lights near a McDonalds. He roused, saw the Yellow Arches and mumbled “Ah, Donalds, E I E I O” and fell back asleep.

Another anecdote came from a grandmother putting on her make-up and used a tissue to blot her lipstick. Watching granddaughter asked “Why are you kissing the tissue good-bye”.

I hope that you enjoyed those little tit-bits and feel free to write in some of your examples of what the kids have said that made you laugh.

NOW WHAT ABOUT YOUR MEMORIES OR YOUR STORY

You can write about childhood memories of where you may have grown up or moving into the area. Tell us about your school days. Where you worked, played or went on holidays; your first car; that first date, getting married or maybe the history of your family, group or organisation in the district. This page is about memories so tell us yours.

If you have some great memories, or perhaps you belong to a local community organisation and would like to share your organisation’s history or story with us then feel free to share your memories or experiences by writing to 17 Rose St., Baulkham Hills NSW 2153 or email to ivor.jones@hillstohawkesbury. com.au You can also share memories on any of my Facebook memories groups including Hills District Memories which you will find at https://www.facebook.com/groups/ Hills.memories/ or Hawkesbury Happenings & Memories which you will find at https://www.facebook. com/groups/Hawkesmemories/

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